Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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