i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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