So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize