Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Randomize