some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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