ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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