Your favorite bartender is back from prision
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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