I heard we made out
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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