my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I think I just sharted jello shots
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize