how can u be prego again
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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