You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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