is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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