i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
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