K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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