It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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