Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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