That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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