i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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