After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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