I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize