I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
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