ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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