"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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