my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
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