I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize