let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize