i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
it was like his penis was on wheels.
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why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
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Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize