I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize