The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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