We're facebook friends in real life
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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