This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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