She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
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