do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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