im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
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