I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
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i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
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The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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