just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
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I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
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Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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