his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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