Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
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He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
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You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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