So drunk, too bad you don't want this
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Randomize