you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize