Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
Randomize