I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize