wakey wakey hands off snakey
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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