The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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