You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Randomize