So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize