operation harelip BJ is a go
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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