Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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