for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize