now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
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